Thursday, July 26, 2012

breastmilk or bombs: which scares you more?

Traveling with Ruby is so much different than traveling alone. When she was younger it was hard for various reasons (as you may have read here or here).

For those who don't know, liquids cannot be carried on to the plane unless it is specifically for the baby. As stated on the TSA website:
"You are encouraged to travel with only as much formula, breast milk, or juice in your carry-on needed to reach your destination."

So when I was flying out here to Oregon (to finally meet up with Camm), I looked in my mom's fridge and realized there was still 3/4 of a gallon of whole milk. Being the cheapskate that I am, I was NOT about to just let it go to waste (that's like $2.00 that I'd be dumping down the drain!). But I was flying in an airplane, so how was I going to get 3/4 gallons of milk to Oregon?

Even though this wasn't formula, breast milk or juice, this is the only thing my baby is allowed to drink (per the doctor's orders at her 1 year check-up), I correctly assumed it would be fine. The problem that I saw was how could I convince them that I needed 3/4 of a gallon for a 1.5 hour non stop flight (not exactly "only reach my destination"). That's where my creativity had to come in. 
I filled up every water bottle container that I could with milk and put it in a little mini-cooler that I brought with me. When I got to security I gave them this sob-spiel about how I am a paranoid mom that is afraid that our flight will get cancelled and we'll end up spending the night in some random town...yadayadayada. And actually, that part worked pretty easily. (Funny thing is I'm not actually like that at all. I can't even imagine how could I be stuck in a town that has no stores to buy milk? But I can see the headline now)

The TSA man had to take the milk aside to do some testing. Now, I assume that this man has been trained to work with bombs, guns, knives--you know--dangerous stuff.
While he was testing it some spilled on his hand. All of the sudden I noticed he looked really uncomfortable-uncomfortable to the point that I think he actually looked scared. He turned to me and asked,
"Uh, is this store bought?"
I was so confused by the question, "uh, yeah. I didn't milk my own cow if that's what you're asking."
Immediately relief flooded his face and he said, "No, I just thought it was something else."
I began to understand, "Oh, you thought it was breastmilk?"
He stuttered for a second, "Uh..yeah, I did."
I guess to the TSA man he thinks like this:

Anyone else think boobs are scarier than bombs? Because somehow I'm just not seeing it...


  1. That's a real nice drawing of a breast there expressing milk. haha

  2. haha yeah, because that would be so sick if milk from a human was on his hand, instead of milk from a cow. lol, good one.

  3. haha yeah, because that would be so sick if milk from a human was on his hand, instead of milk from a cow. lol, good one.